What can and can not?

What can and can not?

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Everyone has some idea of ​​how to raise a child well and how to develop behaviors that allow people and society to adapt.

All parents agree that it is a basic educational task to teach a child what is good, what is wrong, to understand and accept it: there are things that you should not do, others have to do, and there are others that you can do, if he wants. One of the important tools for learning and learning a code of conduct is what we call discipline.

Disciplinary form

A series of scholarly experiments and systematic surveys carried out in recent decades on a wide range of subjects throughout the world attest to the fact that parents discipline their children from the earliest age, defines the character of the child, the integration into the community. It is very important, therefore, to expand our knowledge of the various disciplinary forms and their expected effects. Perhaps that is why so many people believe that discipline can only be maintained through fear-inducing violence and threats, and few believe that it can be disciplined with praise, good words, and simple exhortation. Thus, even today, the form of education for power and awakening, the use of situational, often bodily, is very widespread. The result is usually very sad, as the child knocks himself out of direct control. If his mother is open to him, he, he commands, he threatens, he is tyrannical - as he has seen and experienced by his parents. Parental love, unlike belief, is not a self-proclaimed universal human trait that everyone dies of having a child. Love is an affective relationship that is primarily manifested in behavior and action, and has degrees accordingly.

For kids, "yoga" means more for adults than for adults


Does the mother, who provides all the necessary physical care, love her child first? There are some who care for your child, but only to the extent that they do not endanger your physical ability. Mental impairment is usually not as obvious, not as easily as physical neglect, and its effect is often shorter. A child who is emotionally neglected, in need of affection, either becomes wild, is distrustful of the environment, is afraid of any unusual situation, or is inclined to be brutal, often hostile to the world. on the contrary, it will be almost "impenetrable", escaping from all its weaknesses, and it will not be able to develop balanced relationships.

Missed opportunities

There is another, disguised form, of variation of lovelessness. Parents bring their children to the world by their own determination, following their own desires, and this is most natural. Many people, however, bear the role of parents as some kind of humorous shit. Complaining to your children that they have missed many opportunities in life, all lives are renunciation, sacrifice. They wish for caring, they are waiting for their love. However, it is incomprehensible to a child, especially to a smaller child, why they need to be happy and unable to understand that their mother suffers from being loved by them.

Family friendly "courtesy"

It is also common for parents to develop good behavior in in the name of social-family courtesy, they show excessive rigor. Many families have very rigid traditions of "decency," behavioral habits that the child must first adapt to. However, among the multitude of rules, the child feels as if he is always trapped, as he is truly caught up in the "rickshaws" of prohibitions. "Don't talk if I speak", "don't mess with yourself", "don't ruin your game", "don't do this, don't do it" because "it is not our business" - hears unos-untalan. Meaningful children want to discover their surroundings, they want to know objects, people, they own a small piece of the world, and they try to make adults understand what they are trying to do, what they are trying to do, what they are trying to do. And then he notices that if he suppresses his curiosity, his desires, his faces will be smiled, and the kindness of the good child will be neglected. Your top job is to help ensure this relaxed, comfortable position for the long term: accept it and love it.

Whimsical parents

In particular, it is worthwhile to give birth to a moody changing, extensive education. The little child is unable to navigate the parents' puppies: when mom or dad is jolly, resting, they are babysitting, and at times, they are invincible, powerful and righteous. It means that everything we do is right and right. If he was punished, he publicly told me he was wrong. Since you do not recognize the changing demands of parents, you may find it better to do nothing - so much less trouble. They think a profound sinfulness is now completely insecure, hindered, recaptured.However, it often takes the property of parents to behave in an unpredictable manner, causing their anxieties to become disoriented.

Evenly, consistently

Developing the most appropriate forms of behavior does not require special educational tools. The uniformly warm, loving felnцvх lйgkцrben child is trying to identify the beloved szьlх szemйlyйvel, magбba йpнti kнvбnalmait, is trying to elйrni szьlх elйgedettsйgйt, elismerйsйt, elkerьlni helytelenнtйsйt viselkedйsйvel, conscience kцzvetнti szбmбra the szьlх hangjбt, wears jutalmбt цnmagбban jу magatartбsa valуban. Love is central to the child's life. You have to feel free to move freely in your environment, but they are careful, controlled, in some situations, rebuked, misbehaving. So you gradually learn to distinguish between right and wrong.

When are you?

To a child, "goodness" means more to adults than to adults. Unfortunately, parents are often called good children when they feel bad about themselves: usually, when the mother's wisdom is very quiet in the corner, or she is " he wants to involve him in play, not jogger, not dirty himself, do not grab anything that gets his hands in the way. playing with your father, clinging to your mother, words: the more intimate you are, the parent knows the abilities, qualities, aspirations of your child, the less important it is to number, it must be out of the child's best interest. Only in this way can you raise a child who is able to interact with his / her peers, who is able to act, is able to interact with his / her peers, and learns slowly what to do and what not to do, what to do and what to do.Related articles:
- The emotional education of our children
- What mommy's free is not her baby's
- The natural baby
- The five most common misunderstandings in parenting


  1. Wahanassatta

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  5. Ceolfrith

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  6. Shasida

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